5:47 a.m. - July 30, 2003
I have been a bit distant as of late. No I am not creating drama. I am working thru a few "environmental" issues. Work, Friends, Family. Sis said I need to get out of the "All or None" mentality. So the question I pose is this...How do I change ME after 37 years? I have been Black or white all my life and I should change now? I honestly dont think I can. I was told by Cyclops and Bible Beater last night that I am a little bit selfish too. And mostly selfish with "TIME". Sorry cant help it. Okay enuf of that. I just gotta get this out. Car therapy may be order this weekend.
The cute guy at work came down and talked to me for a while yesterday. I really wanna go out with him cuz I think he is cool. (note not naming the puppy here!)
Eric came over last night. He is a super guy but like the rest trying very hard to schedule my time for me. He has already asked me to go on vacation with him to Montana? And wants me to go to Florida with him for turkey day. DUDE. EASY. Funny thing about all this is I havent sacked him. Maybe I shoulda. He wants to go see the Yankees play tonight. I really dont wanna go. I wanna come home. Guess I am gonna hafta tell him I need a little space. WAY too crowded here. Settle down already.
Still planning on going to the concert alone saturday night. I called Sass and asked her if she wanted to go. She told me she would call me and let me know. She didnt call. So I guess thats a no. I suppose I need to give her space so she can enjoy her new relationship. I hope she knows I love her and I miss "US". But I am happy for her and she deserves happiness. Time for the party girl to step aside and give Sass and E room.
I need to do something fun. I wish FP was playing again. :)